Employees and Children

I was talking to a hand the other day, whom was rather despondent. I asked what was wrong and he told me that he could never do anything right. I said: “surely you do something right, you’re still here.”

He replied: “well you would never know it, the f8%#@3@ boss is always yelling and telling me about what I screwed up. Even when he compliments me it is off handed in a snide remark about some other mistake I made. I really hate it when he explodes in front of the other guys or customers.”

I had witnessed some of what the hand was talking about. The situation reminded me a little of my dad.

Family Chores and Children

My dad was a strict man, and expected good results. He was also a very hard worker that didn’t need the breaks that many people demand today. In fact the more arduous the task, the more he liked it. 

I remember a white washed rockery we carved out of the bank in front of the house. Although there was a lot of yelling and cussing during the process, at the end he said “well now that looks pretty good don’t you think?” That is the closest my dad got to complements to me. However, my dad was always good about bragging about me to others, usually when I wasn’t around. My dad’s work philosophy was reflected in advice he gave me when I went to work on my first road construction job: “look around and find the guy that works the hardest. Try and match him shovel for shovel; and only take breaks when he does.”

Employees Are Not Children, and You’re not Their Parent

Most small business owners haven’t had the benefit of good human relations training. In fact, the only management guidance they have…is how their parents treated them. What they have is a vision of what they want their company to achieve, and they have taken on the responsibility (and risks) of how to achieve it.   Many employers of small businesses treat their employees like children because that is the only management experience they have had.  I think about my Navy leadership training (and subsequent training) that passed on the golden rule of management “criticize in private, praise in public.” Also, employees are not children or military subordinates. So, phrases like “get over here, now,” or belittling yelling, just doesn’t work with employees (or friends for that matter). Employees are not children and their employer is not their parent. Sometimes it is important to point out an employee’s short comings (in private) but it is also important to give praise when earned (in public), even if it is to acknowledge success of a small task. But the praise must be genuine, or the employee, or the employee’s associates, will recognize “praise for praise sake.” Success and praise shared with employees builds loyalty. Loyal employees are not hired, they are developed. Respect is not demanded, it is earned. Cowboys used to have a phrase that described their loyality to a good boss or outfit.  It was called “riding for the brand.”  The employer developed such loyality in the hands that they would (and often did) ride into battle for them.  People that can do better….do better, be in on the job…or leaving one…That’s Cowboy Logic.